Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Entry #3 Cameron Highland and then I Lost a Father

I had always known that there were problems. If only it can be fixed. Then I would probably be a different person. I would probably be more tolerant, happy, unemotional, trusting and have faith in love. But in reality, it wasn’t fixed, it was left that way. I despised fate for being so cruel. I still remember vividly the whole trip. My father arranged a vacation for all of us to Cameron Highland. We all agreed since it has been so long since we had a family vacation. If I knew that it was going to be the last time I had a vacation with him alongside everyone in the family, I would appreciate every moment I had. I would hold him so tight. But now he belongs to someone else. He’s no longer a part of us. But it hurts the most that he is happier now than then. I used to hate it when he argued with my mother. But now I miss hearing them because it was so funny. It was cold when we stayed at the home stay. It was beautiful that everyone cuddled up to each other at night. I still remember the roses I bought. The strawberry keychain as well. The food we ate. I miss being seven of us, but now we’re six. I had face the fact that now he’s gone. Because I love my father, I would be happy if he’s happy. I should be happy for him. Sooner or later I’ll have to accept the fact anyway. Pop, wherever you are, hope you know, I love you and I’ll be there for you if you need me. I won’t turn my back against you even if it hurts.

Coming up next: Terengganu and Loneliness

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